Karon Beach, Phuket

We decided to do one last beach before booking out of Thailand. We decided on one of the classics that made Thailand famous, Phuket. We found an amazing deal on a hotel a 10 minute walk from the beach that was newly renovated in old Spanish décor.

This Beach completely kicked our ass! It was so damn beautiful. Karon Beach was generously covered in densely packed, tiny silk, orangy-white sand granules that felt like heaven beneath our feet. This beach, as far as the actual topographical beach goes, was the most beautiful we have ever visited. No matter how far you went out into the water the sand remained soft, and you could really go far out as it didn't drop off much. The temp was hotter than hot and we paid hard for this beach worship- we both got bad sunstroke!

The most beautiful sunsets were had at this beach. The pictures say it all.

The downside was definitely all the oldies, and Scandinavian families they were EVERYWHERE! Actually we felt more like we were in Sweden or Denmark than Thailand! Which isn't all that bad if you like looking at fat, 60 year old, grandma boobs!

Traditional Thai Therapy And A Touching Story of A Loving Family That Survived The 2005 Tsunami

Note: this is where we left off chronicling our adventures around Asia...
Matt's Beard was getting a bit out of control so we scowled the small island of Phi-Phi in search of a barber to give it a clipping. Finally we fond one. In front of the modest barbershop was a delightfully happy child. He was overflowing with joy as he kicked a small soccer ball back and forth with some tourists.

The lady was just finishing up with some local's hair cut so she, with a big smile, asked me to sit until she finished up. She seemed to glow with the same measure as the child playing in front.

We noticed that someone behind the barber chair was getting a massage. It wasn't your typical, everyday massage (get your mind out of the gutter). A smiling Thai man was hanging from 2 bamboo rods that hung from the ceiling parallel to the bed. He was jumping, stepping, and dancing all over the patient. Massaging them with only his feet!

He really looked authentic and there was an extremely good vibe that emanated from his smiling face. We read the testimonial book and it had only amazing reviews. So we decided that we wanted to give this native Thai healer a crack at us. Alissa was feeling as though something wasn't quite right so she was to go first.

Underneath the testimonial book was a book about the 2004 tsunami. As we waited for our beard trimming and massages, we flipped through the book and read a few of the survival stories. While reading one of the stories we realized that it was about this family.

After the 2004 tsunami struck, the husband (the smiley man giving the massages) gained consciousness and realized that the tidal wave had thrown him way far up in the canopy of some palm trees. He had no way to get down. His wife (the barber), pregnant at the time with their child (who now played in front of the store), was swept out to sea. She remembers gaining consciousness when, another Thai pulled her out of the water, tore off her Buddha pandant, then, after ripping the necklace off, threw her back in the sea. It wasn't until much later, a foreign tourist from the USA jumped in the water and brought her ashore. It was unreal what these people went through, and even more unreal was that they all survived and were just living there lives right in front of us!

After waiting about one hour finally I got my nasty, hippie beard trimmed, and Alissa got the massage.

The man stomped all over Alissa, and moved energy with his feet. He also got right on top of her and pushed on her with all his might. As he stomped, shuffled, and danced on her body, Matthew told me that he learned this kind of healing from his mother, who in turn, learned it from his grandmother. He explained in very broken, heavy accented English that it is rooted in Traditional Chinese Medicine.

The whole experience was wild to watch and even wilder to experience as Alissa's innards gurgled, rumbled, bubbled, as his feet purged Alissa of blockages. He was a bit concerned about Alissa's condition, fearing that it might get worse, he insisted that we come first thing tomorrow morning at 7:00AM just before catching the ferry for another free treatment.

These people were excessively nice and were wonderful healers. Later, as you may know, things did get much worse! To this day we are unsure weather his crazy massage made things better or just brought out the worse, either way, it was an amazing experience that we will always remember.

A Frightful Encounter With Intimidating Island Monkeys While Sea Canoing In Phi Phi National Marine Park

Alissa convinced Matthew to take his camera on our two man sea canoe to snap some pictures before climbing carefully onto its plastic body. We proceeded to paddle in tandem around high jutting limestone mountains, under rocky ledges, and between tight passes. It was awesome.

We came across some monkeys that were eerily staring at us as they reclined out on the rocks. We paddled in slowly to take a closer look and snap some shots. Our canoe got pretty close. As Matthew became more preoccupied with taking pictures, we soon found our canoe partially pinned up against the jagged rocky shore. The laid back monkeys slowly approached us, resenting the fact that we were photographing them. Now they were closer. They continued to encroach on our canoe that was helplessly beached up on the rocky shore. We frantically tried to dislodge the hull of the canoe from the spattering of jagged rocks. As the monkeys got closer we could see their dark eyes beam with territorial disdain.

Closer and closer they came, posturing with clenched little-monkey fists as if to defend their homeland. Just as one monkey touched the canoe we managed to free it from the greedy shore, distancing ourselves from them. Panicked, we peddled out from the shore, but the waves seemed to be attempting to beach us once again. A few monkeys started to wade knee deep in the water. In a furry of strategic paddling we broke away from the monkey island.

As we paddled into the scenic horizon, we breathed a big sigh of relief. We were safe once again.

Phi-Phi Island and National Marine Park

Some of the most breathtaking scenery was found here. Beautiful limestone structures make the turquoise water that surrounds them jealous. If you go, you have to take a canoe around some of them. The pictures really speak for themselves, this place is almost heavenly in its beauty. The snorkeling was also stellar, the scenery underwater would challenge that above it.

The real shitty downside to this island, something that you can't see in any of the pictures, is that there was so so so so so so so many damn people crammed on these islands and in the picture-snapping boats that circled them. So although this island had the most amazing scenery, we could hardly force ourselves to stay more than one full day.

Peace

Koh Lanta, Thailand

When we arrived on Koh Lanta we breathed a sigh of relief. Koh Lanta felt like it was abandoned compared to Koh Tao. The atmosphere was very environmentally conscious and had a local chill friendliness about it.

We waisted no time in finding a place to sleep along Hat Phra Ae Beach. This time we landed nice wooden and bamboo bungalows that had high roofs and attached open roof bathrooms. There was something intimately natural and refreshing to be able to have a cold shower under big fluffy clouds and bright blue ocean skies. How much more intimate it was to drop a deuce!

It seemed like a chore to get Alissa out from the hammock on the porch of the bungalow even though the beach was just a few meters away.

It's hard to believe but the beaches are even more chill than the accommodations. We'll always remember a beach peddler walking, arms full of hand made merchandise, down an almost deserted beach. Finally when she got to us she gave us a look then walked into the distance. We kinda get the feeling that business is a little slow. Ha ha.

We had a good few days on this island ,then before becoming too lazy, we were off again.

Our Sleeper Boat Trip Scam From Koh Tao To Koh Lanta

Here’s another one to add to the books…

They crammed about 100 of us into a shity little wooden Thai boat like a canner cans sardines. Some of us had old, thin mattresses that would better be described as sleeping pads. The real lucky ones even had small pillows that were barely big enough to support a head (small lucky heads like our were fine).

The sleep on this baby was surprisingly good. A swaying drunk circle of bongo playing hippies lullabied us to sleep as diesel fumes from the motor beside us nuddged us deeper into sleep. One of our most peaceful moments in Thailand was waking in the middle of the night to the light covered squid-catching boats bobbing radiantly in the steep dark of night.

As it turned out we waited an hour or so (enough time for the tour companies restaurant to profit from our hungry breakfast bellies) after making landfall. Then we boarded a bus that took us to the Karabi port where we were supposed to board a high speed ferry to the island of Koh Lanta.

We (and all the others who had bought tickets in Koh Tao) were had. They filed us into a minivan then into a shittier mini van, then into a public island ferry, the some more driving, then another ferry. Finally, a little cheesed off, we arrived in beautiful Koh Lanta.

Sunset Shots From Sairee Beach

Koh Tao (Turtle Island), Thailand

Koh Tao is a relaxing, youth filled island that is mainly obsessed with open water diving. The beaches are all a beautiful powdery pure white with about the consistency of the flour used for baking.

On Sairee Beach where we stayed, this powdery sand stretched into the ocean at such shallow of angles that the aqua water radiated heavenly crystal clear blue-green, especially in the mornings when the tide was just right.

We ended up staying in Coral Grand Resort that offered up free accommodation in this top end resort with purchase of a PADI open water diving certification course. The course cost about $300.00 USD for the four days of training. The resort had nice little bungalows secluded by the jungle-like atmosphere of the surrounding gardens. Unfortunately, we free loaders were only offered basic hotel-room-like accommodation at the back of the property but we both agreed we were getting a hell of a deal.

The diving was good with Moray Eels, Large Groupers, schools of Barracuda, and even territorial Trigger Fish frequently spotted by our group out in the water. We even saw a Sea Turtle in the distance, the amphibians for which this island was named. Okay, actually Matthew was the only one in the group that didn't see it.

If you don't want to dive, don't get turned off this cool island. We both agree that the beach would be perfect for a young family because the beach is so shallow allowing for great visibility. We saw a few families with there toddlers enjoying the rockless beach along with some friendly beach dogs. There is also an awesome yoga studio, borrowing elements of Thai traditional houses, it is a shimmering beacon of peace on this beach during the day. Perhaps the nicest part of being a non-diver on Koh Tao is that you get large swaths of the beach to yourself throughout the day. This is especially true during the mid-morning and afternoons when most divers are out in the water. Alissa enjoyed her time here cat-posing the beautiful days away on this beach.

At night the vibe is ratcheted up a notch as hypnotic beach tunes spill out along with BBQs, firedancers, and laid back crowds (but not so many backpacker losers) lounging about with the moon reflecting off the waters.