I ALMOST DIED... AGAIN!

Last night my friends Ron from Chanon, and Erin from Pusan converged on Daegu with one thing in mind... HAVING FUN... These are a few fun points from the night of
doin Daegu up right...

Point #1

Aurthur, Mark (my Chillin Chilgok buddies), Ron, and I had a few "gettin juiced up before we hit the town hard" beers while waiting for Erin's train to get into town. The train station is below the biggest, most famous department store in Daegu, The Lotte Department Store. We drank beer on the big stairway that leads up to the posh department store(in Korea you can drink beer anywhere... besides, we have rockstar status in Korea). After we consumed a few beers, a random, old Korean man approached us. This old dude stood beside us for a long time. He didn't really talk to us, he couldn't speak English, he just laughed uncontrollably any time we started to laugh... this would, in turn, cause us to laugh uncontrollably at this laughing dude... and this would trigger an even louder, more out of control laugh from the laughing dude... this crazy, over the top laugh would then cause us to just loose it... and the cycle would continue until our guts hurt. We had lots of fun with this guy...

Point #2

The Monkey... It's the name of the Dance Club we went to. We did it up crazy at this place!

Point #3

The Thunderbird... It's a lounge that's located on the third floor of a downtown building owned by a White Canadian guy that everybody calls "Moose". The lounge is small but if feels like any other bar in Canada... It's a popular hang out for foreigners... and it's my favorite pub to kick it. It even has a foosball table. The beer on tap is Red Rock, a Korean made red ale... it's by far the best beer I've found in Korea but its really hard to find... we hung out there for a while to cap off the night downtown (bars close at like 5:00 AM... pretty much just when everybody leaves).

Before leaving the Thunderbird I felt the needed to pee. I had consumed such large amounts of my favorite brew and I really had to go. Since you can pee anywhere in Korea (I've witnessed a drunk Korean dude, just drop trow and make yellow in the middle of a busy street), since my friends were a little bit a head of me, and since I live so intensely all the time, I decided that it would be fun and "in the moment" to pee out the third floor stairwell window... BAD CALL MATTY!!!

Although, it initially felt so wonderfully relieving, and liberating to dispense such large amounts of urine out a third floor window... the end result wasn't good. Why? Well unbenounced to me, my friends had walked all the way downstairs and were exiting the premises (it was a monster piss OK) through the door that was directly beneath the open window I was defiling! Ohh NO!

Not only did I end up peeing all over my friends that had walked down the stairwell and, inconspicuously, walked into my streaming yellow fountain of liberation... BUT I also ended up peeing over some Bruce Lee, I-can-probably-rip-your-beating-heart-out-of-your-body, Korean Dude... sadly enough, all this occurred as I was completely oblivious to everything that was going on below. A ledge that was extending out from the wall was completely impeding my view... and of course I was completely, absolutely inebriated at this point!

So I finish peeing, zip up, and drunkenly stager down the stairs... When I got to the bottom, my sopping friends are severely pissed off (pardon the pun). But their anger paled in comparison to the red hot fury of "Bruce Lee"... Ohhhhhhhhhhhh SHIT!

Before my drunken ass could even understand why the hell everybody was so mad, I was being put in a "dragon death hold" by Bitter Bruce! He held me with his "fists of fury" and motioned to punch my head off with his "dragon punch of death". But before He could strike, my urine soaked friends intervened and pleaded to Bruce in their best broken Korean to spare my ridiculously drunken ass!

Their skills of broken Korean, and improv acting were quite impressive because they managed to convince "the Dragon" that it was all just a stupid accident. He let me go and disappeared into the night...

The lesson of this story...

Everything you do,
Every decision you make,
Even the seemingly harmless little things,
Effects something or somebody

Remember this wise advice next time you need to pee REALLY bad and there's no bathrooms around!